Friday, March 24, 2006


(Adam doing his impression of a Malaysian minister of information)

For some inexplicable reason the first page of The Star newspaper I turned to this morning was Page N10. I was very glad that I did that because it started my morning off with a big belly laugh and that doesn't happen often these days with the kind of news we've been getting.

There on page N10 under the headline "RTM to launch third channel" was this hilarious quote from the minister of information, "We are working towards screening only good quality programmes." Hahahahaha...what a joker he is this YB. Listen, YB RTM has been trying to do that for the past 40 years. Without any success. So pardon us if we don't hold our breaths for your obvious attempt at "I'm the new minister so I am going to have to say something worthy of the post of Minister of Information"-ism. So Ali, Ah Chong and Samy get ready for more RTM trash to hit the airwaves. In the same story was something less funny. Apparently, RTM is going to celebrate it's 60th anniversary by throwing more good money down the longkang. The YB announced that RTM is going to rename its two TV channels and is planning on launching a 3rd one.

TV1 and TV 2 are going to be renamed...wait for it...RTM1 and RTM2!


In his infinite wisdom the YB is going to cause to be spent probably millions of Ringgit to affect a name change to something which is almost exactly the same as the old one. Way to go, YB. You've proven conclusively that you have what it takes to be a Minister of Information in Malaysia. The YB also threatened that TV2/RTM2 is planning to broadcast round the clock. Yawn. Waffor, Yang Berhormat? More programmes featuring badly dressed, pea-brained, out of touch with reality, bush jacket wearing goons sitting in a row discussing topics nobody is interested in all set against a backdrop that is reminisent of LSD induced color hallucination?

On page N12 of The Star headlined, "IRB leads in saving electricity" it is reported that IRB chief executive officer, Tan Sri Zainol Abidin Abdul Rashid had always stressed the efficient use of energy and would ask that all lights and air-conditioners be switched off when nobody was in the office". But since IRB is a government office wouldn't that be ALL the time? Great savings indeed.

On the same page Deputy Minister of Youth and Sports Datuk Liew Tiong Lai announced that "Companies should send their staff for training and upgrade their skills to remain competitive." Oi! YB if you are so clever to speak why doesn't the Kerajaan practice what you preach and train their staff like you advise? You're funny la.

And this is hilariously scary. The proposed second bridge for Penang is estimated to cost RM2.6 billion. RM4 billion saved from fuel subsidy=improve public transport services=RM2.6 billion to build bridge=not enough money for busses, trains upgrade=cut some more subsidy=DAMN TERUK

Page N4 announced the opening of the new low cost carrier terminal in Sepang. I must admit that I have not been following the progress of this project. But can somebody tell me why there was a need to build another terminal when to all of us ordinary Joe's the KLIA looks very under-utilised? And of course, being a typical Malaysian project the planning wasn't so good la. The low cost terminal (LCT) is situated kilometers away from the KLIA and the Express Rail Link (ERL) terminals. From what was announced a few days ago the shuttle bus service from KL to the LCT appears to be a hurriedly put together after-thought and will probably cause a lot of inconvenience and discontent among people who need to use the LCT regularly. What about passengers who need to commute from KLIA to the LCT? I am sure there are shuttle bus services but from reading what has been in the press about the LCT and its services I don't remember reading a heck of a lot about all this nitty-gritty stuff which must be an integral part of launching something like LCT. Hai mai? So all you flers who need to use the LCT make sure you get there hours and hours before your flight or connecting flight or you'll be forced to endure typical Malaysian hospitality for longer than you want to. Hahahaha... sorry ah.

Okay a quick quiz for you. Where in KL do you board the shuttle bus that will take you to the LCT? If you took more than 5 seconds to answer it means we're screwed!

Here's another one. How much does it cost to take the KL-LCT shuttle bus?

BEEEEEEEP! You're screwed! Thank you. Next.


midnite lily said...

boo-hoo... i'm coming back tomoro & going to land at the LCC Terminal. wth?! MAB & MAS jealous of AirAsia, have 2 sideline them to a LOW COST carrier terminal?! does that mean other LCCs who want to fly in (e.g. Tiger Air etc) have to land there too? letsee how inconvenient this is gonna be.

Anonymous said...

haha eh...lct was built with the aim or reducing turn around time yadda yadda yadda..

bout the shuttle bus...seems that its taken from RM 9 one way...ERL complainin bout it cuase it's wawy more than ERL's 35 one trip...and there is a shuttle between klia and lct

patrickteoh said...

Thanks anonymous. Did you make the 5 second time limit? I don't think ERL is going to lose that much. Non low fare passengers aren't going to take the bus at RM9 and then have to lug their luggage up another bus to reach the KLIA. Or are they? Now we wait la. For the stories and complaints about the inefficiency of the service to roll in. When that happens the YB's will all come out and make statements..."It must take time for things to settle in. The Rakyat must not complain. After all, we're better than Ghana you know." But as a friend of mine pointed out recently Ghana is in the FIFA World Cup 2006. So that statement may not work anymore.

JT said...

Firstly, isn't TV1 and TV2 used to be RTM1 and RTM2 waaaaaay back? Can't recall...but if it is...well, that's how money are simply wasted.

On the LCT's the economy airport for poor people like us loh. Well we can't have a ciplak handbag shop in Starhill, can we? I'm definitely not going to take that AirBus even though it's only RM9 bucks...very afraid of the traffic jam (i guess it will take at least 2 hours from LCT to KL Sentral). Might as well take a shuttle bus to KLIA, hop to ERL to Sentral. But then again, let's pray the shuttle service (from LCT to KLIA) will not end up like those shuttle services offered by our Star/Putra LRT.

I'll be flying back on April 12, so for those who have used it, pls give us your generous feedback.

kress said...

rm 9 at kl sentral mar.... if take from klia is free until april something... somemore the buses operate until 12 midnite oni..... got prize ahhh? =)

btw, i always loved your midnight ghost stories... never failed to keep me awake.. =P

SaDdNesZ.jc said...

If my memory doesn't fail me...

Isn't the names of the TV1 & TV2, RTM1 & RTM2 respectively like 15-20 years ago???

So what's this about a name change again??

Nadev Usav said...

well akchuali ah, dis YB Informasi is trying his bes lah. He mus show his kabinet frend that he also can change ...change name first, then chage logo, then change song... and to do all this change, he must go study tour "belayar sambil belajar" or someting like that. If he don plan like that one, then how to ask for bajet? Then people say he good for nutting!

kk said...

Hello Patrick,
Hiya...from tomorrow onwards, I shall check your blog first before getting a copy of The Star:)

Didn't RTM just go through an over-haul last year or so when that minister who always wear a bow tie one still in charge?? (Kadir is it?). I was one of those suckers who really bought into it and decided to give RTM's TV2 a chance by tuning in after the so-called revamp..I was dumbfounded..where's the change ah? hello... Anyway, I know for sure its ad agency can't wait for another round of change...change change loh...cost you money only wa. Lots of it.

I was damn TL after hearing about this LCCT thingy. I don't know who was that smart ass that came up with this brilliant idea by having the LCCT terminal built at this place where the birds don't even want to lay eggs there. I am a regular Air Asia flyer and this really turns me off man. Now everyone can't fly liao lah. Too troublesome.

Have a good weekend!

Anonymous said...

Hi Patrick,

I remember listening to you an watching you on TV3 reading news (!) when I was young. Just discovered your blog and I love it! So nice to see the other side of you that we can't see on air haahaa.. keep up the good work.

Trashed said...

Ei, anonymous, if I recall, Patrick also showed very briefly the other side of himself on TV3 but kena the keluar sign after that episode. Alamak, TV3 at that time too sensitive for some human kindness lah.

Ahhh, Patrick can ask you a question or not ? Is that how a LCD induced hallucination looks like ? I donch no because when I was young, I was very goody goody.

And if that is the case, maybe the RTM production design flers must have been snorting some of that stuff, too (nudge, nudge!)

Ann said...

I'm confused. Weren't TV 1 & 2 known as RTM 1 & 2 a while back? And if that's so, what's all this about new names? But the key question is, is this change/reversion going to be accompanied by fundamental changes, such as quality programming and fresh minds at the top? (I know, I know, I'm dreaming.)

Anyway, thanks for the laugh. I was indulging in my daily caffeine fix when I got to your blog, and almost snorted coffee from my nostrils.

hokkien kiah said...

aiyoh .. you don't know meh ?? MAS is very jealous of AirAsia lar cos' being small ciku kiah company can make profit & somemore can buy per kee (airoplane) but MAS so called the pride of Malaysia, Malaysia punya .. is losing money, selling off MAS building & somemore now need to beg AirAsia to employ some their staffs. If sack them, MAS boh bin (no face).
so make AirAsia life difficult lar.
these ppl are jia lat. support AirAsia more !!

i've just said...

i can answer that!!

From KL to LCCT...

KL Sentral...only RM9!!! the heck i know? I jsut got back from Langkawi..touched down at LCCT...and saw one of the counter with the ad..

but this LCCT is stoopid...MAS limo cannot go into're stucked in LCCT for quite some time..becos we already booked MAS Limo...they picked us up from the office on Tuesday morning to KLIA...and supposed to pick us up from KLIA again on Friday afternoon...but we touch down on LCCT..and MAS limo couldn't come into

atan said...

Hi, Patrick
How do you know that the name would be changed from TV1 & TV2 to RTM1 & RTM2 respectively? Where is your source?
Maybe they want to rename as TB1 & TB2 to reflect a more malaysianised version, can or not?
Btw, TB=TeliBision.
Oops, I miss your voice over the air.

Anonymous said...

LCCT = Low Cost CON Terminal?? (sounds like CON Air where ppl in the aviation industry CON you)

LCCT = Airbus RM9 + Opportunity cost(Time)

Excuse me, the transport minister is damn useless. What for come up with a terminal when poor Malaysia citizens have to fork out additional DUIT (Msia Cash)+ Time for moving from one terminal to the other? Why cant travelling be more convenient?

This is so senseless planning. What a birdbrain man. Shows that our ministers are really no brainers.

Now i dread the day come when i m planning to fly via AirAsia..

So does this tag line "Now everyone can fly" still applies? Heck no man. Thanks to our senseless Government.

patrickteoh said...

atan, how I know ah? I read it in the Star newspaper ma. I told you isnit?
the MAS limo cannot go into the Low Cost Terminal!!! Why? I didn't know that the rivalry between the two airlines ahd come to this.

Yes, Ann TV1 and TV2 were known as RTM1 and RTM2 not so long ago. I think they have affected this 'change' a couple of times in the past. The last big 'revamp' was done by that Sheikh fler in the bow tie who promised heaven and earth but never delivered. He's gone now and another fler has taken over so this fler also needs to change something ma. Actually, that bow tie fler likes to change things. Not for the better. When he was in charge of tourism he changed the slogan from To Know Malaysia Is To Love Malaysia to Malaysia - Truly Asia. Quality programmes and fresh minds at the top? My dear Ann you better stop smoking whatever it is you're smoking. You're hallucinating:-)

trashed ah. No lah those RTM flers didn't OD on LSD la. They just don't have any creative juices in their bones. Also can't be bothered la. Heh heh remember my episode on TV3 news that got me fired eh? I wonder how many people actually saw and remember that kissing scene on the national news:-)

Oi JT tell us about your experience using the LCT and Airbus when you can. Thanks. Should be interesting.

Anonymous said...

I'm interested... how did you get fired!! What did you do dude? Can tell or not? I was a big fan until I had to leave the country for studies. When I came back, you were off the air..

marsha said...

Fui Yo, what's with the name change for TV1 and TV2. anyone still watching meh? tell me....

like only 8% of the population (maybe even less) watching TV1 and TV2. Even those without ASTRO now watch TV3, NTV7 and 8TV, kay?

I say just wrap up the stupid channels and just save us the pain, agony and money.

I hate it when government simply splash our money around on something that is not needed.

marsha said...

and also interested in how you got fired, Patrick. Pray tell.

midnite lily said...

stupid channels? tsk.. Marsha, did u know RTM/TV2 is second in rating next to TV3?

tjwork said...

heard something like TV Perdana or Rangkaian Perdana popping up lately. Is this true?

no basis, just talk from little birds.

anyway, the LLCT is a good boost, a good start & they should have done it way ago.

It does some in this things:

1. Create its own market, it would be branded as a LCC hub & this is what Malaysia needs.

2. Traffic will increase here & it will force other transportation companies to focus on LCCT. hence the old issues will fade over time.

One thing for sure is the direct coaches from Puchong, Cyber Jaya ++.

3. Air Asia has a better say over MAS on the new Terminal, they ran a profitable airline & therefore could make the LCCT more popular than KLIA.

They have more control over the facilities (Except the airline maintenence for now) & facilities to their customers (like wireless broadband & cheap food stalls).

4. Because of the traffic, business will bloom around it.

So Patrick, this is not a bad idea after all, rather than biting dust & paying high taxes, malaysians could actually travel cheap.

Trashed said...

I cannot say much about the incident on TV3 regarding Patrick because I did not see it. I only hear hear lah.

But the other party was quite chun and that was her last day. That is why Patrick, being a nice fler that he is, wished her "bon voyage".

Tapi, TV3 flers must have got jealous because Patrick got the jalan to have a small time cium. Dunno if it really was on the closing credits but must have been darkened already, so what's the problem, brudder ? Long story short, Mr Teoh didn't have security entrance to TV3 any more.

Anonymous said...

Another day of showing how incapability of our YBs. We are all screwed up big time. Tv1, TV2, RTM1, RTM2, who gives the f***??!

The backdrop sucks. The image sucks. The content sucks. So, who gives a shit about what they are going to do next?

All the musical shows/concerts or anything like dat can't even attract local people. Be it wiv Siti NUrhaliza or anyone, people just don't give a damn!

Some sources in RTM told me that the biggest problem to all this lousiness is their refusal to use new technology and new blood in the station. They have good facilities, but yet, they prefer not to use it. Less to say, means they don't have to learn. All these old people just want to 'goyang kaki' and ' makan gaji'. Everytime the younger generations tried to implement some new ideas about this, they protests and eventually forces out the newcomer..

Hmmm... nepotisme...

patrickteoh said...

Marsha says there are stupid channels midnitelily says that TV2 is second only to TV3 in ratings. Actually, I say that both of them are right. Get it?

Marsha, actually I wasn't fired because of that incident. I was "not required to be on schedule" a few months later. They never told me the reason.

TJ work, I am not sure I understand what you are saying about the LCCT but I am sure you have your reasons. Thanks.

Thanks trashed for telling the story. Now it will keep them guessing. There might be some bloggers out there who actually saw the incident on screen. Maybe. I wonder where she is now. Always thought she was a #1 Babe while everyone was salivating over that skinny, horse-riding, royalty-dating one.

Anonymous said...

I am still salivating over the skinny horse-riding, royalty-dating one hehheh!! So which one you cium? You lucky fella!!

Ah LionG said...

Aiyaa... why worry bout changing names... it comes everytime the minister change, at least the current and the 2 before... the rebranding would mean many money to contractor... from baju to building... can turn the economy maa.. :P

I actually think the TV2 - Hello On Two (HOT) quite nice...

Watch you on TV3 --- then u got fired
Listen to you with Yasmin on Radio 4 --- then the incident with sum VIP
Jazz Cafe --- over liao??

Ehh.. when u gonna do some online show... POdcast seem nice... Co-Host Jeff and Smith - The Malaysia "Mr. Teoh Show"

Anonymous said...

I look forward to a Podcast!! This your opportunity to get back into radio and what you do best!! It like running your own radio station too withouth the hassle of long hours on the job. Look forward to your podcast!! Go for it.

patrickteoh said...

Hi anonymous. Yes I have thought of podcasts but it doesn't interest me because it is not "live" and wouldn't have that edge to it if you know what I mean. I have been toying with the idea of a "live" blogcast but after speaking to people in the know re IT I discovered that it wasn't as easy as I thought to set up. Meaning, it takes quite a bit of money. Which I don't have. You know any generous philantropists?

Oi! Ah liong, I didn't get fired from TV3 la:-) Like I said I was informed that I wasn't "required to be on the schedule". Radio 4 incident with a VIP? There was no such incident. Well, expept for those episodes with the dancing ducks and the alleged corrupt policeman. But they can hardly be considered VIP, right? Jazz Cafe season 1 finish liao. Season 2 starting shoot in May.

Wah anonymous, still salivating over the skinny horse-riding, royalty dating one ah? Ya I know she was a real babe too. And nice. Which one did I cium?'ll have to find out yourself la.

midnite lily said...

re: TV2 rating 2nd & stupid -- hahaha!

my LCCT review...

shufi2101 said...

Howde, Mr. Patrick, sir. First of all, I’m a big fan of yours. I watched you on tv, that Jazz thing and on the silver screen too. Just love it the way you said, “Anam bulan ka? Saya cakap anam bulan ka?” in “Baik Punya Cilok”. That was really-really, hilariously cruel!  Hats down, sir.
Just acknowledged your blog, so I’ve decided to ask a bit or two bout The Homecoming. I was there on March 25th, the 8.30 pm show. Actually, this is my second visit to KLPAC. Before this, I have watched Separation 40, directed by Zahim Albakri (Dramalab) & Alvin Tan (TNS) in October 2005, and we have a dialogue session with the director and the actors. Quite a disappointment when we couldn’t interact that night. My questions; what was the significant of Sam falling down after he blurted the secret? Is he having some kind of illness (might foreshadowed by the limping) or else? Secondly, I was inside the hall during the intermission but a guy asked us to go out because they wanted to make some changes to the set. However, there were no changes when I re-entered. What’s the catch? Well, I wanted to let you know that we all enjoyed the play, well… apart from the annoying chuckle (not so chuckling eh) from the lady in front me which laugh all the time. I know one thing; this is comedy with “dark humour” elements but that doesn’t mean that we should laugh all the way without thinking. All right, sir. You may have lots of work to do, etc chauffeuring somebody-somebody to somewhere on the company’s limo. Do visit my blog at , and probably leave comments if you will… surely makes an impression if you do! Best wishes!

Sam said...


Please don't broadcast around the clock...!

The last thing I need is to wake up at 3am and get tortured by the suckiest channel on the planet... *yawn - drops dead from boredom*

God have mercy on the YB for his sins. LOL

C-Fu said...

TV1 n 2 might be sucky, but here's the thing:

People actually *like* them. Or more correctly, they *watch* them.

By people, I mean the collective power of the rest of Malaysians that we might comfortably want to forget. People like around the Sabahan mountains, the "kampung people" who don't need Astro, the stay-at-home wives who had to stay because the family can't hire a maid, the illegal aliens, the deaf who wants to watch the news, etc. etc.

If anything, we only hear and agree that TV1 2 sucks just because our voice are louder, both in the city around the honks and traffic jams as well as in the blogsphere. Malaysia ada 22++ million people lah brader. And while say, 5 million orang-bandar-Astro-owners hate the RTM channels, the other millions of people still tune in. Not to mention that RTM still has the largest penetration coverage around Malaysia by quite a margin compared to other TV stations.

Lest we forget that RTM menang tons of awards compared to TV3 and Astro combined. That actually tells a lot wat.

but yeah, the whole TV1/RTM1 debacle is sickening. Like WTF MATE ZOMG!!!!!11satu

ANYWAYS. U wanna make a radio station ah? SHOUTcast is free wat. or go pirate the "pirate radio" software la, lol. Or go subscribe to live365.

I have a Malay chic living in France who broadcasts her own radio, together with P Ramlee-kinda songs all the way from France. All by using shoutcast server and a couple of other, FREE stuff.

C-Fu said...

Oh btw about the awards thingie, I was referring to Anugerah Sri Angkasa.

Anonymous said...

LCT was built (1) to screw Air Asia (2) somebody hungry already

BTW which other LCC flies here anyway ?

afiq said...

I have to agree with c-fu.. From where I came from: Sabah, astro, tv3, 8tv is popular tv channels in Kota Kinabalu but certainly not in Kudat, Ranau, Beaufort or any other rural areas. I hiked there once in a while with few friends and I descovered that eventhough some areas have tv3, they still prefer tv1 or tv2 coz its simply more Malaysian.. And their otai songs are among the fav of the community.

Aswad said...

on the LCT.

the low cost terminal means that airlines dont have to pay expensive parking at the KLIA.
all planes parking their planes at KLIA or any other airports in the world have to pay some fee to the airports and it is a huge sum.

and this affected Low cost carriers lah like Air Asia and what you have there because they cant raise their pricing because of their low cost nature lah. err make sense ar?

anyway, the LCT came into plan after Air Asia dont want to pay parking at KLIA which was expensive. Air Asia wanted to use the old Suband airport for low cost carriers hub but Subang Airport dah tak boleh pakai.

so government and Air Asia came up with the LCT proposal, so now u have the new airport lah where the parking is cheaper.

how i know?
i know lah hehhehe

(buruh indon yang buat airport tu dan juga KLIA, KLCC, Putrajaya, KL and everything else in KL lah.)

patrickteoh said...

Hey aswad. Thanks for the information which I am sure a lot of people will find enlightening. But we are not so much peeved at the opening of the LCCT but rather at how it was launched without ALL the proper infrastructure in place. Not enough planning, no testing, no contingency plans. Yes or not?

And all those who 'defended' TV2's quality. Points taken. But it doesn't mean that lack of choice should propogate poor quality, right? We all know that ASTRO, TV3,7 & 8 are all basically catering to the urban population. But does that mean that our rural brothers and sisters should be penalised by languishing in the quagmire of ignorance?

c-fu, thanks for the info on SHOUT cast and all. However, I must admit to all of you now that I am almost a computer/IT illiterate. Anyone out there want to help? Basically, what I want to do is a daily 1 hour 'live' broadcast of TOKKOK with interactive feedback via text from people 'listening' in. Can ah?

Shufi2101, sorry la brother. I can't help you there. You take out what you want from the Pinter play. There isn't right or wrong. And please don't ask me, "What is it about?" LOL...glad you had a good time at the performance anyway. Thanks.

Nadev Usav said...

LCCT not being made ready before opening to the public is not unlike the rushed opening of KLIA by the now "quietly retired, speak-when-spoken-to" erstwhile Minister of Transport. So we have a MOT tradition to uphold. (I know because I was in the thick of the KLIA project)

As for the planned revamp of TV2 or RTM2 or whatever Zam Zam wants to call it, I think we shouldn't poo poo the idea so quickly. I for one do turn to it during the predictable "NO TRANSMISSION" spasms of our FAIR WEATHER CHANNEL - ASTRO.

Unlike the supply from TNB and PUAS where you don't pay for what you don't use, the screwballs in government have turned a blind eye to the fact that we have to pay whether or not we receive signals. In MALAYSIA, you BOLEH screw the public so long as you pay your dues to "national development"

Anonymous said...

Em the point of a low cost terminal is THAT - LOW COST.

Why it's so far away? Because it's a low cost carrier?!

C'mon. Read other newspapers besides The Star la. The reason why it's a low cost terminal is that
1. there's not going to be any passenger ramps leading directly to the plane
2. You get ferried to the plane via shuttle bus or you walk.. yes YOU WALK.. Think 1970s ok.
3. The terminal itself has minimal maintenance, so there's not going to be the 1001 shops lining the sides of the terminal.

And please.. low cost IS low cost. That's why most people use Air Asia. You don't get food service unless you pay for it. You don't get all smothered with first class service ok. Bring a small hand luggage cos you're gonna be lugging it around with all the extra 'travelling'.

If anyone can't used to it, go back to MAS.

transport consultant said...

Patrick, i follow all the comments about LCCT with great interest.

Just to let you know that LCCT was "launched without ALL the proper infrastructure in place. Not enough planning, no testing, no contingency plans" because our Malaysia-boleh guys want to thump a certain neighbourly low cost terminal over the opening date. Guess what,, we beat them by 2 DAYS !!! (yet we start constructing much later than them )

Ruben said...

Hey Patrick, its me Ruben. I've been to the IRB. in fact, in my line of work, i visit the IRB virtually every week. It is one of the coldest and brightly lit places i've ever been too.

Fizz said...

Hello Patrick,

I remember listening to your talkshow every morning on Radio 4 circa 1994-1996. You and yasmin Yusuf were the best pair ever. Ah those were the golden age of radio I may say so.

If you need help with the shoutcast thing, I'm willing to volunteer. Just let me know via boeing767 AT fastmail DOT fm.